A father carries pictures where his money used to be. ~Author Unknown
We advance in years somewhat in the manner of an invading army in a barren land; the age that we have reached, as the saying goes, we but hold with an outpost, and still keep open communications with the extreme rear and first beginnings of the march. ~Robert Louis Stevenson, "Virginibus Puerisque II," Virginibus Puerisque, 1881
One father is more than a hundred Schoolemasters. ~George Herbert, Outlandish Proverbs, 1640
Inflation is when you pay fifteen dollars for the ten-dollar haircut you used to get for five dollars when you had hair. ~Sam Ewing
I don't care how poor a man is; if he has family, he's rich. ~M*A*S*H, Colonel Potter
Thanks to modern medical advances such as antibiotics, nasal spray, and Diet Coke, it has become routine for people in the civilized world to pass the age of 40, sometimes more than once. ~Dave Barry, "Your Disintegrating Body," Dave Barry Turns 40, 1990
You are only young once, but you can stay immature indefinitely. ~Ogden Nash
I don't care how poor a man is; if he has family, he's rich. ~M*A*S*H, Colonel Potter

Never raise your hand to your kids. It leaves your groin unprotected. ~Red Buttons

Youth is a disease from which we all recover. ~Dorothy Fulheim
We advance in years somewhat in the manner of an invading army in a barren land; the age that we have reached, as the saying goes, we but hold with an outpost, and still keep open communications with the extreme rear and first beginnings of the march. ~Robert Louis Stevenson, "Virginibus Puerisque II," Virginibus Puerisque, 1881
It would seem that something which means poverty, disorder and violence every single day should be avoided entirely, but the desire to beget children is a natural urge. ~Phyllis Diller



My father used to play with my brother and me in the yard. Mother would come out and say, "You're tearing up the grass." "We're not raising grass," Dad would reply. "We're raising boys." ~Harmon Killebrew
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